now there's a show I'd like to see....

 one thing I always wanted to see was after Simon Cowell ripped into a young contestant on one of those talent shows was instead of breaking down they simply stated, "Fine. You do it. You're the expert. Show us how it's done"

I digress. I managed to see a small part of Junior Master Chef. These precocious little dweebs serving up this pretentious muck that I am sure no audience member will ever eat, let alone prepare. Instead of being a complete waste of television they should inject a touch of the ironic, with a judge along the lines of Simon Cowell. I can see it now....

"What have you prepared today?"

"I made a three cheese chicken quesadilla with lemon lime rice and a black bean puree"

(judge tastes food)

"Well, it's hard to actually know where to begin. Here's a thought. I want you to go home - no. Go backstage and get on the closest computer and on the internet. Type in repugnant - synonym and you will see a small lexicon of words to describe how I feel about this dish. Abhorrent, revolting, repulsive, disgusting. Vile, foul, nasty, nauseating and offensive. These are but a few descriptors for this epicurean tragedy. Maybe for accuracy you could look up the synonyms of all the other words you find. Not only does it remind me of the time I choked on my own vomit; it reminds me of the time I choked on someone else's vomit. I  wonder if this culinary act of devastation could be registered as some type of criminal offence say, along the lines of a crime against humanity?"

"Now get out!! and someone get me a bucket."

now there's a show I'd like to see....