terror - part two

 

once again, terror - not terrorism.

now this happened a little while ago so I waited to see if anything else would happen as a result of it. I am walking along the street and I can see this man become animated as he is walking towards me

"how the bloody hell are you!?!

"fine, WHO are you?"

"sorry, I forgot I was wearing a mask. It's me! From school!"

now more than three decades have passed so I can only hope for a little bit of latitude in this situation. But I can't remember this person for the life of me. To aid my memory, he starts to recall moments in time when a lot of people I remember fondly were there and we were all together.

then comes the moment of terror. I have many dear memories of these events and scenarios like they were yesterday. The problem is I can't remember this person being involved or present - at all. It's like someone had taken a detailed photograph of these experiences, then taken a pair of scissors and cut this person out of all of them. Everything he described.

at this point I can't even try to pretend being enthusiastic. Maybe as a strange defense mechanism he starts describing all the amazing things he has done since school. The positions he has held and all the monumental buckets of money he has made. It has become so obvious that he is offended that I don't remember him, then comes the riposte

"well, what have you been doing?"

I have no desire to engage in this.

"pretty much living my life, alright!"

then - a stony silence. after a few awkward pleasantries, we go about our way. but a new and different kind of terror has presented itself. He lives locally. Now I have to rely on my peripheral vision to see him out of the corner of my eye so I can avoid any type of gaze of acknowledgement. As a bizarre courtesy, the first time it happened recently, I notice that he has done the same. But even peripherally, I can tell he looks really pissed off.

maybe this event is just one reason as to why I have avoided school reunions like the plague.

terror.